Busted Halo

Most dating and relationships books, columns and shows won’t go near issues of faith. Author, professor and speaker Dr. Christine B. Whelan assumes faith has some role, and tackles even the toughest questions.

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August 16th, 2010
Hispanic-American singles discuss shifting gender roles

The Bible may advocate the idea that the man is the head of the household, but how does this generation of Hispanic-American singles view this concept? Where does this leave women who make more money than their husbands? Are we mistaking typical Latin “machismo” for church teaching? My Cuban mother once told me it would be my duty to iron my husband’s shirts, if and when I got married. Really? My “duty”?
In a fast-paced world where even Brooks Brothers — one of the oldest American clothing institutions — has responded by manufacturing non-iron shirts, should we adapt as well? And more importantly, how does upholding these gender roles help or hurt us?
To answer these…

August 13th, 2010
Praying the Rosary Rarely, Not Regularly

August 15 is the feast of the Assumption. According to Catholic tradition, at the end of Mary’s earthly life, she was assumed body and soul into heaven. In the spirit of the day, this article looks at a form of prayer traditionally associated with Mary.…
Many people find comfort in praying a daily rosary. No matter what else changes in their lives, that circle of beads is a regular, dependable, soothing part of their normal routine.
I am not one of those people.
It’s not that I dislike the rosary. On the contrary, it’s been the catalyst for some of the most powerful spiritual experiences of my adult life. But though I’ve tried to make it part of my regular routine, somehow I can never quite keep it going. That could

August 11th, 2010
"small town discrimination"

In this video, Miguel talks about racial tension and his experiences growing up as an undocumented hispanic in a small town in the United States.
In video 1, Miguel, an immigrant from Mexico who migrated illegally with his family when he was young, speaks about how he had to hide his undocumented status from those he was closest to growing up.…

August 10th, 2010

Fr. Dave interviews academy award-winning actor Robert Duvall about his new movie, Get Low.  They talk about the movie and it’s faith themes.…

August 10th, 2010
A pioneer of mestizo theology uses the image of Jesus crossing borders to illustrate a spirituality of redemptive inclusion

The great challenge for Christian leadership is to help people go beyond fears of difference and experience diversity as God’s way of bringing about new creation, said the Rev. Virgilio P. Elizondo.
Elizondo has been recognized by Time magazine as one of the leading spiritual innovators in the U.S. for developing a Christian theology within the context of the Mexican immigrant experience.
He is professor of pastoral and Hispanic theology at the University of Notre Dame and also serves a parish in San Antonio, Texas. In 2007 he received the Community of Christ International Peace Award for his advocacy on behalf of justice and inclusion for immigrants.
Among his books are The Future Is Mestizo, Galilean…

August 6th, 2010
A Busted Halo Service Trip to a Peruvian orphanage (plus some ways you can help from home)

With the success of our Spiritual Seekers Camino pilgrimage, we decided to explore expanding the offerings of Busted Halo-themed travel for young adults. In partnership with Franciscan Spirit Tours this summer we accompanied college students from the University of Memphis on a service trip to Peru. The volunteers spent a week clearing a space to install a water purification system inside Ciudad de los Niños, a Franciscan-run orphanage for 300 children in Lima. They also took the time to film their project and discuss how the trip affected them physically, emotionally and, of course, spiritually.
How You Can Help
Ciudad de los Niños has been run for over 50 years by the Capuchin Franciscans and it sustains…

August 5th, 2010

Welcome to the 2010 version of Busted Halo’s Freshman Survival Guide — the first college guide to offer a holistic look into the lives of college students by combining practical advice on student life — academics, relationships and lifestyle — with guidance on coping with the emotional and spiritual issues college students face. Here are our online Freshman Survival Guide resources for 2010:

August 4th, 2010
Eve Tushnet discusses conversion, the theology of friendship and her argument against gay marriage

At a time when the issues of homosexuality and religion are creating enormous rifts and clearly defined factions within many faith communities, Eve Tushnet is a category unto herself. The freelance writer and blogger became aware that she was gay at around age 13 and felt very supported by her parents. (Dad is a Harvard law professor and her mother is an attorney involved with issues surrounding the prison-industrial complex.) Then, having been raised in a Reform Jewish/secular household, she encountered a philosophical debating society while she was an undergraduate at Yale, and the conversations and debates she engaged in there eventually led her to convert to Catholicism.
Now, at age 32, Tushnet is a unique…

August 4th, 2010

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Busted Halo: It sounds like this was not a huge issue to your family when you came out of the closet, right?
Eve Tushnet: They were very, very supportive but also able to set boundaries and rules. Sort of basic stuff that I think they would do with any teens — like when I was dating this girl, she had to stay in a different room. Basically they didn’t use the fact that I was gay as an excuse to go completely hands-off in parenting.
BH: Were you sexually active? Is that something you explored?
ET:… I guess it’s important since people do tend to assume if you’re celibate then it’s because you don’t care about sex. So yeah, [whispers] I was sexually active.

August 3rd, 2010
An open letter to Anne Rice

Dear Anne Rice:
After returning to the faith ten years ago, I am saddened to hear that you are no longer a Christian. You noted on your Facebook page that you refuse to be “anti-gay, “anti-feminist” and “anti-artificial birth control.” You said:
“In the name of… Christ, I quit Christianity and being Christian. Amen… it’s simply impossible for me to ‘belong’ to this quarrelsome, hostile, disputatious, and deservedly infamous group. For ten years, I’ve tried. I’ve failed. I’m an outsider. My conscience will allow nothing else.”

It is that reason and not merely the act itself that saddens me most. First let…

August 2nd, 2010
How to listen to the voice inside that’s telling you not to go down the aisle

Within three months of dating a guy, I could always tell why the relationship should end. But most of the time, I’d keep dating him anyway. We were having fun. I thought he might change. I didn’t want to be alone. Some of these relationships lasted for years, but finally that voice deep inside of me started screaming. The gut feeling in the pit of my stomach turned into queasiness that I couldn’t deny. Mind you, these were all wonderful, loving guys. They just weren’t the one I was supposed to spend the rest of my life with.
When I met my husband, Peter, I checked in with my gut at three months. I was sort of wondering if it had gone on vacation, because I wasn’t hearing any complaints. I remember going into a church…

July 29th, 2010
The actor discusses his new film

Robert Duvall discusses his new film, Get Low, as well as The Apostle…, his career and upcoming projects with Fr. Dave Dwyer.
To listen to and/or download the podcast of the interview, click here.

July 28th, 2010
Our summer photo contest heads into overdrive for the month of August

Our “Don’t Forget Your Halo” photo contest has been a huge hit so far, with readers and radio listeners sending in their halo pictures — busted and otherwise — from points all around the globe. We’ve had newborn baby halos, family pet halos, Parisian halos, Central American halos, cake halos, burger halos and pizza halos. In fact, we’re so pleased with the wide-ranging response to our contest that we’re setting a new goal. We want to see halos from all 50 states in the U.S. by the end of the summer. So check out our map below, and if we haven’t received a photo from your state, it’s up to you. Bring your halo to your favorite spot and show some state pride!…

July 27th, 2010
A retired law enforcement officer's perspective on immigration reform

I have lived my life believing in human rights, equality and the law. I am a retired deputy sheriff and have dealt with immigrants, documented and undocumented, up close and personal. I have seen them abused and I have seen them abuse the law. But, as both a Catholic and a retired law enforcement officer, I would like to put forth a perspective rarely touched upon in this debate occurring here on Busted Halo — the perspective of the law.
There is no debate on the fact that comprehensive immigration reform is necessary. The debate resides squarely in how it is to be handled. There is little doubt that undocumented persons are victims of past legal mishandling, corporate greed, bigotry and a host of other social…

July 25th, 2010
Can the concept of affirmations be reconciled with radical honesty?

A reader, Janice J. Holladay, LPC, raised a great point the other day after reading my old column on radical honesty. She had just read a book about affirmations and said:
“It seems that trying to fight a self-defeating belief system with something one knows is just a lie is not the way to go. The book suggests that you say/believe it anyway even though it’s “not yet” true. I just don’t see that lying to oneself ever serves any purpose, and we all do it enough anyway.”
I have been asked variations of the “Are affirmations lying?” question many times, and it is a common source of confusion for people new to spiritual and self-improvement work.
My answer is: It depends.…

July 22nd, 2010
Busted Halo's interns discuss the new mind-bending film

This weekend’s smash hit Inception is the latest in a string of strong, mind-bending mediations on the nature of reality in the vein of The Matrix, Dark City and Memento…. The film focuses on Dom Cobb, a man whose job it is to enter a person’s dream and steal information from his subconscious. As the film progresses, Cobb and his team members — and those of us in the audience — begin to lose grip on exactly what is real and what is a dream. In our own world, the digital landscape provides us with many alternatives to reality: television, video games, and the many role-playing websites the internet offers. These technologies can bring attention to an important world issue, send vacation pictures,

July 18th, 2010
The perils of being single, Latina and over 30

Nathalia Ortiza and her friend Lisa Fernandez discuss the perils of being single, Latina and over 30.
If you’re over 30 and you’re single, Catholic and female, there’s only one more ingredient that could make for a combustible “cosmo-mojito” cocktail: being Latina. I was born and raised in the U.S. but when it comes to dating, the fact that I’m technically American means nothing to my very Cuban aunt. Up until a few years ago she and several of the women in my Hispanic family hypothetically shopped for the dresses they would wear to my hypothetical wedding. Whether I had a boyfriend or not didn’t matter, because to my traditional family, romantic life is like the setting on your Facebook account: You’re…

July 16th, 2010
"hiding from friends"

Miguel, an immigrant from Mexico who migrated illegally with his family when he was young, speaks about how he had to hide his undocumented status from those he was closest to growing up.…

July 13th, 2010

A Pope’s choosing of his Papal name is always symbolic on some level, so Fr. Larry gives us some details on the life of one of the previous Pope Benedicts, in hope that we may gain a deeper understanding of Pope Benedict XVI.…

July 11th, 2010
Donna Freitas' novel This Gorgeous Game looks at priestly sex abuse through the eyes of a teenage girl

Donna Freitas is best known for her provocative nonfiction book Sex and the Soul, which was based on scores of interviews she conducted with college-age students about “sexuality, spirituality, romance and religion on America’s college campuses.” Beyond her work as a scholar and college religion professor, however, Frietas has forged a parallel career as a novelist. Her first novel, The Possibilities of Sainthood earned accolades in the Young Adult fiction genre back in 2008. Her most recent novel This Gorgeous Game… tackles an unusual theme: a Catholic priest stalking a teenage girl. In the midst of a new wave of accusations of sexual abuse coming from Europe, Freitas’ work tragically

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