I prefer the retro chic of spending Christmas just like Mary and Joseph did — traveling arduously back to the place of your birth to be counted, with no guarantee of a bed when you get there. You may end up sleeping on an old wicker couch with a dog licking your face while an Ab Rocket infomercial plays in the background. It’s a modern-day manger. — Tina Fey

Practice extreme patience with your relatives this Christmas. Call a family member with whom you have trouble being patient and wish them a Merry Christmas.


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