In Lumen Gentium (Light of the Nations), the voice of the Second Vatican Council urged lay people to rise up in their roles within the larger body of Christ, stating, “…may every opportunity be given them so that, according to their abilities and the needs of the times, they may zealously participate in the saving work of the Church” (#33).
Besides raising families, managing homes, and working in professions, lay people are called to be actively involved in their local Church and community — but what about those who feel called to something more?
Succinctly defined, laypersons (whether they’re single or married) who strive for Christian perfection under the guidance of a religious order while still living in the world do so within Lay Third Orders. These men and women are considered members of a particular religious community in a tertiary branch, and they make promises for life to live within the charisms of the order they select.
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Charisms are gifts given by the Holy Spirit for the benefit of the Church and the good of humankind. Each religious order is inspired by certain charisms that define its mission and community life. A primary Carmelite charism is contemplation, for Franciscans: poverty, for Jesuits: education, and
Dominicans: preaching, to name just a few of the many religious orders that exist.
From the age of 18, I was drawn to Carmelite spirituality. Having read “The Life of St. Teresa of Avila by Herself” in my first year of college, I was deeply moved by St. Teresa’s profound spiritual life, and I wanted that for myself — not a surface-level faith, but a faith of rich depth, intentional prayer, and close union with God.
Then, when I was 20, I visited Knock Shrine, the Marian apparition pilgrimage center in Ireland. This was my first experience considering a deeper devotion to Mary, particularly how I could turn to her for guidance in my own life, as my ancestors — the Irish — had done.
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As I considered my future vocation and career, I began praying the Rosary with my mother when home from college on the weekends, and this prayer experience developed into my writing my first book, “The Joyful Mysteries of the Rosary as Invitations for Peace,” which I published when I was 22. I continued to progress in my faith and wrote several more books on the Rosary and Our Blessed Mother.
When I was 24, I visited more Marian pilgrimage sites, including Fatima in Portugal and Lourdes in France. I was moved by the international Rosary processions and the thousands of pilgrims entrusting their cares and dreams to Our Lord through his mother. Also on this pilgrimage, I visited St. Avila’s convent and saw some of her relics, and read St. Therese of Lisieux’s “Story of a Soul” earlier that year.
While I had married several years prior as well as started my own small business, I still felt a stirring for a life of contemplation amongst my active commitments to my marriage and career, both of which challenged and inspired me to love deeper and serve more faithfully. The pull towards the Carmelites was still tugging at my heart, and at 26, I attended my first lay Carmelite gathering in my diocese with the Blessed Trinity Discalced Carmelite Seculars as a visitor in the summer of 2025. Instantly, I knew this was where I was meant to be.
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“I choose all!” St. Therese of Lisieux said, regarding her desire to be all things for God, all for his glory. I wanted to be both lay and religious; I wanted to be both in the world and outside of it for Christ; I wanted to have a rule to guide my life so that I would be tied to my faith always. The Carmelites gave me all of that.
In the spirit of Our Lady of Carmel, lay Carmelites are asked to make a daily commitment to praying the Liturgy of the Hours (morning and evening prayer), attending daily Mass whenever possible (preferably at least 2-3 times a week), and spending at least 30 minutes in prayer through silent meditation, particularly with the Scriptures (lectio divina). In addition to the above promises, attendance at a monthly community meeting for further reading and study of the Carmelite saints and their writings/spiritualities is expected.
My days are now permeated with sacred rhythms. I am experiencing a taste of religious life while still actively living and participating in the secular world. I love silence, hunger for Mass and the Scriptures, and am part of a larger Carmelite community united in contemplating and serving Christ more closely alongside Mary.
LISTEN: Examining St. Therese of Lisieux’s Autobiography With Fr. Michael-Joseph Paris
I am about six months into a six-year journey of preparation before making lay Carmelite promises for life, but already I am feeling greater closeness to God and camaraderie with the religious in the Church. If you’ve been feeling a tug to go deeper in your spiritual life, consider looking into a Lay Third Order. Regardless of where the Lord might be calling you, turn to him in love within your family, work, and home, and you will be “zealously participat[ing] in the saving work of the Church” (#33).
