When I was in high school, before making my confirmation, I learned about the Stigmatine Laity (Third Order Stigmatines) from a Stigmatine Brother who was doing his pastoral internship at my parish. After several conversations with him about the order, I immediately knew that after being confirmed I would answer my calling and become a Lay Stigmatine. Apart from feeling that I was called to be part of an order as a lay person, the contributions made by Stigmatine religious to the growth of our archdiocese appealed to me. In particular, the deanery (or group of parishes) they`ve been working in since they arrived in South Africa is home to the majority of the priests who work within our archdiocese. The order inspired many vocations to the priesthood. Therefore, I wanted to be part of their support structure so that their fire can continue burning.
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Unlike Thérèse of Lisieux, I never felt called to be a priest, but like her, I wished to be a spiritual Mother. In one of her letters to Celine, her little sister, Thérèse of Lisieux writes that instead of being envious of the priests of the Lord, let them rather pray for them and be their spiritual mothers.
And so, I have been a member of a third order since my university days. We are called Lay Stigmatine Associates (Stigmatine Laity). We are a group of lay men and women, both married and single and in different ministries who are associated with the Congregation of the Sacred Stigmata Our Lord Jesus Christ (Stigmatine Fathers and Brothers). We live our Christian lives under the light of the Charism of St. Gaspar Bertoni, the founder of the Stigmatine Fathers and Brothers. The Stigmatine Laity support the Stigmatine Fathers and Brothers in evangelization, assist in clergy formation, and minister to the youth.
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The Catholic Church’s Code of Canon Law states: “Associations whose members share in the spirit of some religious institute while in secular life, lead an apostolic life, and strive for Christian perfection under the higher direction of the same institute are called third orders or some other appropriate name” (Can. 303).
Under the guidance of the Holy Spirit, the Catholic Church has various options of living out different spiritual gifts or charisms. The Holy Spirit has inspired the formation of numerous spiritual and religious congregations to meet the needs of each generation within the Church. While nuns, brothers, and priests profess vows or promises to live their lives according to a specific spirituality, such dedication and commitment is not restricted only to them. The New Advent Catholic Encyclopedia states the following about Third Orders, “Third Orders signify in general lay members of religious orders, i.e. men and women who do not necessarily live in community and yet can claim to ‘wear the habit’ and participate in the good works of some great order. Any Catholic may join a Third Order, but may not at once belong to more than one, nor may he or she without grave cause leave one for another.”
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Confirmed Catholic men and women can become members of Secular Orders (Third Orders). Unlike the religious (nuns, friars, monks) who live a secluded life in friaries, convents, and monasteries, members of Third Orders live inclusive lives – they live outside of the Church and they have families. Similar to the religious men and women, seculars go through a formation period in accordance with the practices instituted by their Orders; after successfully completing their formation, they become professed members. For seculars, profession means that they promise to live according to the charism of their Congregation or Order; however, they do not profess the evangelical counsels (or vows) of obedience, chastity, and poverty.
Becoming a Stigmatine Associate helped me to comprehend one of the most misunderstood yet crucial sacraments of the Catholic Church — the priesthood. Some have wondered why I chose to associate myself with an order of priests and not a community of consecrated women especially because of the clergy scandals that have marred our Church — I believe that this was more of a calling rather than a choice.
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The Stigmatines first home in Africa was in South Africa, at my local parish, and they have since remained around that deanery. The order has more priests from other countries than it has local priests – the first challenge they came across was the language. I found myself mothering them – teaching them the local language; what made it more efficient for me was that I was studying the same language at school. That is how my faith deepened and my understanding of the priesthood and the Church broadened. I had to read and understand different texts of the Church so that none of us gets lost in translation. I would teach the priests and brothers to read the lectionary text in the local language and help them translate their homilies from English to the local language – that eventually led me to answer the calling to the Word Proclaimers ministry.
What being an Associate has taught me and continues to teach me is that priests are the heart of the Catholic Church — helping them nurture their calling and developing their persona, like a mother nurturing her child, and also being their friends, keeps the heart pumping. As Paul needed the support of the Romans on his mission, our priests need the same support – “to be sent on my way with your support” (Romans 15: 24b, NJB).
*The Congregation of the Sacred Stigmata of Our Lord Jesus Christ (Stigmatine Fathers) is a Latin clerical religious Congregation of Pontifical Right for men founded by St. Gaspar Bertoni. Their motto is ‘Apostolic Missionaries in the Service of Bishops’.